Beau's Blog

The world confuses me sometimes.

Like most people, I like consistency. I struggle with contradiction. One challenge in life for me has been to accept seemingly contradictory truths.

Here are some contradictory truths I’ve been chewing on lately.

All We Have Is The Present

I think this is reasonable. I believe the past is a flawed memory and the future is uncertain… so by process of elimination, that just leaves the present.

I also buy into the idea that at the end of the day, all we have are stories.
Who am I? I am the story I tell myself. For you, I am the story you tell yourself.

This contradiction of present and stories/past has irked me.
I suppose we have both the present as well as the past. The past is a collection of stories. They may be flawed memories, but they exist and we have them.
“The end of the day” – after more thought, I think we never actually get to this idea of the end of the day since the end of the day in reality is still a moment that is a present.

Be Kind To Yourself

This is a valuable message for many and I remind myself of this idea often – typically while journaling.

I also subscribe heavily to the power of discipline. Discipline requires me to be strict with myself. It turns out, I may not want to set an early alarm clock or go for that hot run or do that thing I said I would. A grating noise disrupting my precious REM cycles does not feel like kindness.

My best attempt to reconcile these ideas is through the concept of balance.
We need kindness. We also need accomplishment and good struggles. I can accept these seemingly contradictory ideas when considering food and exercise. We need food to be healthy but too much is unhealthy. We need exercise to be healthy but too much is unhealthy.
It is up to each of us to determine what balance here makes sense.

Actions Are Greater Than Words

The idea that talk is cheap, actions matter resonates deeply with me. As I go through my adult life, it continues to hit harder and harder.

Communication and storytelling are extremely important skills. This also feels truer and truer as I go through life.

I think about these two as stats in an RPG (role playing game). Suppose you have points to allocate between strength and charisma. If you’re a rampaging barbarian, strength probably matters more. If you’re a smooth talking swindler, charisma probably matters more. Perhaps a more realistic scenario is comparing a hermit who lives alone far from the city as opposed to a manager at a massive company.

That said, I believe having a baseline level of initiative and ability to act is the more valuable starting point. I believe strongly in diminishing returns and this is a good example where if you are very capable independently, then your next efforts to “level up” are likely best invested in social skills rather than solo skills.

Final Thoughts

Across all of these ideas, the most important thing is to recognize what is helpful for you. Which concepts will make your life better? Use those!

Do these ideas resonate with you? Are there other contradictory truths that tickle or frustrate you?